Stole this from one of the forums.......

Are you tired of the mushy friendship poems that always sound good,
but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a friendship poem
that really speaks to true friendship and truth itself.

Friend, when you are sad, ... I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge
against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
When you are blue, ...I'll try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you smile, ....I'll know you finally got laid.
When you are scared, ...I will tell you horrible stories about how much
worse it could be and for you to quit whining.
When you are confused, ... I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.
When you are sick, ...stay away from me until you are well again. I don't
want whatever you have.
When you fall, ... I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
This is my oath, ...I pledge 'till the end. Why you may ask?
Because you are my friend.

Send this poem to ten of your closest friends (or else you will have bad
luck, go to hell, and get depressed because you realize you only have
two friends, and one of them is not speaking to you right now anyway).

P..S. A friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you move a body.